Hello!

Do you realize next Friday is day 105 out of 105 for breathing ritual????

Soooooooooo very close!! Talk about a massive journey. I’ll write more about that next week cuz it will be my very last day of this year’s breathwork cycle. Here’s this week’s video shot in Two Moon Park next to the Yellowstone River. Video As I was walking through the park, I saw three white tail deers running. And a moment later? A very happy dog chasing them.

As you may recall from my bazillion mentions in my other posts, I’m studying embodied Tantra coaching with Layla Martin. The program is broken up into weekly modules to be completed within two years. The first module contained what’s called a “Top Down” mediation: You listen to you saying positive things about your different stages of life. The homework was to do this practice a total of five times.

BUT BUT BUT

I felt real pushback in my body at the thought of listening to me glow about me. Like really bad.

So?

I started this exercise the same day of this breathing ritual. And I modeled it in the same fashion: I record a video that I play 21 times then create a new one to listen to 21 times and so forth. Yes. There’s been times when I felt incredible resistance in my body and mind. I’ve also felt excitement at other times.

And?

I’m slowly but surely getting more comfortable at listening to me say positive things about me. It’s also helped to slow my brutal inner critic. Yes. She still has her moments cuz it’s going to take more than 105 days to quiet decades of entrenched harshness…

EXCEPT???

I realize that she’s just really trying to protect me after listening to the audio book version of No Bad Parts from Richard Schwartz. Really, dudes??? She’s got her hands full with me cuz I’m always doing shit to keep her on her toes.

After I finish day 105 with the top down mediation next week, I’m going to let that sit in my body for a while. It’ll realistically be next year when I start that back up again. I’m excited to see where I’ll be next year.

I’ll be doing the sex magic ritual starting on May 9, 2026. I’ll post more about it here along with my new website. Yes. I’m about to build that dude for real. I finally figured out the piece to better talk about my overall practice objective.

If you want to know more about the top down mediation, feel free to reach out at

hello @ renewrelease.com

As always: Have a glamorous day for fun!!!

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